By Annelize: We love to control, we love control, we love to be in control. We want to control ourselves; we love to control others. We want to control life in general. What is it that drives us to control circumstances when we do not have control of it? Uncertainty, fear, shame, guilt, blame, just to mention a few.
Some situations are controllable, but then you get to a place in life when situations are not controllable anymore. You must give in, you must let go of the outcome, of the process of what life is unfolding in front of you. But we try to hang on dearly, hanging on for life!
I call it the Art of Letting Go, because it is not easy to do, it is not easy to let go, to someone or something that might be on the outlook for you, someone that might have and see a bigger picture for your life. “The Art of” means the skill of something, a skill acquired by experience, study, or observation according to the dictionary. Thus, letting go is not something that happens easily, it is something that is acquired by putting effort into it.
If we control or hold onto something, we resist change, we resist a different way, we go against anything that doesn’t fit the picture we see for ourselves. Even though we might think that this is best for us, or that we know what we need. Most of the times, holding on and having resistance creates stagnation. We get stuck. We get stuck in a mindset, stuck in certain ways of living. Mostly to our own downfall as we are not open to new opportunities, we are like a racehorse, having just one focused goal. Being stuck in this mode of control, life surely passes us by.
The moment we realise that this resistance is keeping us from growing, keeping us from moving forward, keeping us stuck in the same patterns and mindset, we start to study, we start to observe, we start to explore and putting effort into what is really happening in our lives. We open to new possibilities, we open to change, but this only happens when we have studied the Art of Letting Go. By letting go of what we think is possible, we create space for infinite possibilities to open. A close friend of mine taught me one big lesson in life, things will always change. Nothing stays the same, so at this moment when life feels out of control, when it feels like everything is a disaster, letting go releases the “stuck” mentality, because letting go gives life the full reign so that change can take place, and it surely will.
A short story to explain the picture of Letting go. A young man carrying a heavy load on his back, a backpack filled with every possible little thing that he thinks he might need for the journey. He packs so much that he is overloaded and barely able to walk. He cannot leave anything behind, because, what if? What if that is exactly the thing that he might need. He starts the journey that is filled with climbing high mountains and then low valleys. The mountains are excruciating, he can barely walk, other times the valleys are a bit easier. He is exhausting himself, just focused on his heavy load and difficult journey and barely able to continue his journey. In a small village, he met and old man that had compassion on his hardship, so he told him, let go of all these things you think you might need and trust that it will be provided if needed. The young man struggled to let go of all the things he thought he needed. He struggled to let go of his heavy load and the burden he had to carry. At last when his body was almost giving in, he dared to let go of some things, feeling the lighter load, he started to feel free. He was able to let go of even more until eventually, he had only bare necessities left. He was feeling so free, he started to look around and started to enjoy the journey. Suddenly he could see nature surrounding him, the amazing animals and the wonderful people he met along the road. He was lighter and feeling free. His body was free, his mind was free, and his spirit was free.
It is the same for each one of us. The moment we let go of our burden, of our ways, of our heavy load, that moment miracles start to happen, in fact, they were always there, we were just not seeing and experiencing them as we were carrying and focusing on the heavy burden. Holding onto control so tightly that we failed to see the daily miracles surrounding us that life offers us.
If you are reading this today, I challenge you to let go of control, I challenge you to let go of your way of doing and thinking and to walk into The Art of Letting Go, creating opportunities for life to flow freely through you!
Love and Light,