By Anastasia: Have you ever felt so adored and loved like never before that you had to pinch yourself to see if this relationship was real?
Has this amazing person been doing over the top gestures of dozens of flowers, telling you they will take care of your every need and then without notice dumps you?
Love bombing is an attempt to influence a person by demonstrations of attention and affection. It can be used in different ways and for either positive or negative purposes. Psychologists have identified love bombing as a possible part of a cycle of abuse and have warned against it. If its too good to be true as the old saying goes, it most likely is! Usually we are so enamored with the person who is “love bombing” us, we cannot see the forest for the trees. Most likely you did not see it coming.
Truly, it’s not your fault and you must collect yourself and remember that you went into this relationship with honest eyes and it would never have crossed your mind that a person would act like this. So, how do you protect yourself from this happening in the future? Once burned twice, shy is an old English saying and you will be suspicious if this pattern presents again in your life.
Chances of this happening are very rare for you have had the experience and you will see the signs sooner.
So what is happening? Usually a “love bomber” will bend over backwards to do everything for you all the while working on your good will and sucking your energy dry. It’s a very real emotional roller coaster for them and almost and addicting game they play like an emotional high till they are full up and have you where they want you totally dependent on them. As I always say relationships must be an equal energy exchange and they must let you do things for them too. Usually they will say, “No worries, I got this or you don’t have to do that I will handle this”. If that goes on too much, then it’s a very real red flag and you need to investigate about their past history of relationships before they came to you. If you find they have a string of failed relationships then you must step back quietly and take a good hard look at what is actually going on here.
Everyone puts their best foot forward in a new relationship. When you go for a job interview you tell them all you can to get hired. This is the same thing with a “love bomber”. They will tell you whatever works to get you to attach to them and depend on them till they are done with their cycle and get what they want and then drop you like a hot potato! The cycle usually lasts nor more than a year. Then they attach to the next victim as soon as possible! If you think you have been “love bombed” and need support to get back on track please call me and we can get you going in the right direction.
Love and Light,