By Gertrude: We have many types of relationships and for many of us, those relationships can improve or be detrimental to our lives. It is not always about the romantic aspect of your life because romantic relationships have other dimensions to it that are also important. It isn’t always getting back to the romantic in love feelings. So it can be easy for us to become confused as to where any relationship is going whether it be a lover, family or friends.
It is also true that all of our relationships, even the one we have with ourselves can be a roller coaster. With ups and downs, gullies and peaks. However we don’t always know how to make them work for us. Or sometimes even how to navigate them. What is important are two keys and that is not just respecting yourself but others as well. In addition to that good communication is vital.
Often we can make judgements of ourselves or others. We can make them based on our own insecurities, our past experiences. We all have our own perceptions and we often have to take into consideration. That although we have experienced the same thing with others they have a completely different perception.
Sometimes we can get bogged down in we are right and they are wrong. Often we just have to accept a difference of opinion. In being non-judgmental we will also find that we can have the best and most productive relationships with people that are completely unexpected. So be open to being open and not judging a situation straight away. Give yourself and the other person to learn how to express themselves.
In concentrating on our romantic and sexual connections we can find ourselves crushing on someone or they are crushing on us but either the feeling isn’t mutual or you are both at respectively different phases in your life.
It is always important to teach people how to treat you and that respect starts with that. The respect we have for ourselves. And so therefore we treat others as we want to be treated ourselves. It is also very important that from the get go you are honest and very clear about your emotions and what you are looking for from this connection.
Often these feelings can come upon us suddenly. Our strong feelings all of a sudden emerge. This is not a time to keep silent or keep them private. It is vitally important that you share this with someone. If it isn’t possible with the person you have feelings for then seek a mentor, counselor or a person you can directly express them to.
It might be awkward or difficult for you to express yourself to the person who you have feelings for. As well as the fear of rejection. But a lot of time and unnecessary worrying can be saved if we can have the courage to speak with the person. Don’t be daunted by this. This is why it is an excellent idea for you to seek counsel from someone you trust first.
One of the first signs that we have an interest in someone usually starts with flirtation and banter. Often we can like someone almost immediately. Or even a brief encounter can have us thinking of that person. Not everyone has that initial attraction. So you might find that you are just at different places initially. You may have feelings for someone like this. It can be a painful and confusing experience. Banter and flirting though doesn’t always lead to a relationship. So it is always sensible to keep things in check as you get to know each other.
We can also never really be sure of the other person’s communication style. In fact many of us don’t really know our own ways to communicate. Because everyone expresses their feelings differently. You might find that they are more subtle. Or they like to take time to get to know someone before they make themselves emotionally vulnerable.
Some people are just naturally flirtatious and this means that while they are interacting on this level they may have no intentions of embarking on anything serious. So it is indeed a very difficult thing to assess. Or truly know what another person is thinking.
If you are in a situation where you are unsure of how another person is feeling, this is often a good time to invest in a reading. When I do a reading I will always look for what might be needed to advance the relationship. Or advice how to discover if there is a real connection between you.
So don’t hesitate to have a chat if you are in any type of relationship where you are unsure of how the other person feels. Often chatting about it can open up information or it can give you an insight that you may have missed in the process.
Love and Light,
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