By Ann: More like Prince Harming! Do you have an unrealistic romantic notion of how a man should act? If so, I am here to tell you that he doesn’t exist. There is no such thing as happily ever after except in movies and fairy stories. This charismatic charm can be turned on and off and is a facade to disguise faults. Everyone has faults and at times argue and disagree so don’t be fooled.
Looks are skin deep, we all grow old, but a good heart and kind personality will last forever. These are traits we should look for in a person. Take a good look in the mirror to see our own faults and the faults of our partner because we all have them. Should you settle for “Prince Good Enough”? No, you shouldn’t. Love is a two-way street and takes effort on both sides. Women need to realise that men are human beings that have bad days and good days and deal with everyday life problems.
Life doesn’t come with a manual and we all learn as we go along in life, and we all make mistakes. Don’t have unrealistic expectations because you are setting yourself up for disappointment. That doesn’t mean you have to lower your standards. A man can be Prince Imperfect and be a good man with all his faults.
Having a list of things you think he should have and do will only make you unhappy. Get to know each other and find those hidden gems in each other’s personality to treasure and nurture and grow in maturity together. Don’t compare men with each other and how your friends’ boyfriends/husbands treat them and think why he doesn’t treat me like that, because for all you know behind closed doors, he could be a house devil and a street angel. Remember something charming can put you under a spell as if magical with some sort of power over you. He is not a lucky charm or an object to be displayed or used to parade around. This attitude will only bring unhappiness because no one can live up to these expectations. Prince charming is a fictional character who saves damsels in distress and women shouldn’t need saving, as we have discussed previously this can lead to bigger problems. These characters are romanticized in fictional movies and cartoons. Today’s society has many imposters and scammers seeking love on social media and sometimes trying to swindle vulnerable people out of money. They can be smooth talkers and very charismatic by building an emotional connection pretending to have common interests. This can happen to men, not just women. Red flags to look out for are claiming to be overseas working and unattainable, he inundated you with attention, cancels promised dates, asks for money, etc.
Always ask questions and don’t jump in fast and watch out for any inconsistencies and never share intimate photos as these can be used as blackmail in the future. If it is a scam and you are on a dating site report this immediately and file a report with the police. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Look for qualities like strength, honesty, respect, and someone who is there to defend you in your time of need, and not be a player, that is true charm. Everyone’s idea of prince charming is different, and it has nothing to do with looks, he comes in many packages.
Take time to get to know him and discover the gems inside of him such as kindness and making you feel loved and cared for. The fictional prince charming is depicted as wealthy, handsome, romantic, when in fact he is most likely, insecure, deceitful, and controlling. At first so charming and wonderful then gradually he is critical, demanding and manipulating and uses ultimatums to get his own way and shutting you down. If this is the case and you are not married it would be best to get out while you can, otherwise counselling is a suggestion and stay calm.
Love and Light,