Who Do You Invite In Your Lovelife?

By Sofia: They say that “opposites attract” but in time I came to understand that this is far from true. What applies in life is “like attracts like”. We tend to attract partners of the same vibration, those who are in alignment with who we are. I know what you may think: “I didn’t attract this painful relationship in my life!” or “I want to have a loving relationship, so why do I keep attracting unavailable men?”


Though it is hard to admit, many of us don’t have what it takes to invite this deep and unconditional love we yearn for. Many of us believe that we are ready to commit, that we know what we want and that we are balanced inside. The truth is that love begins with falling in love with ourselves first.

You might find helpful this post here.

Let me share a little of my personal story. Many years ago, after coming out of another relationship disappointment, I took a lot of time to reflect and see what am I doing so wrong with my love relationships. I knew that I was beautiful, intelligent, independent and seemingly having the “package” but… I was tired of seeing guys walking away from my life, relationships that didn’t last long, and feeling that my love had no place to go. I had so much love to give, but every attempt for a happy love life seemed to fail. I knew I was worthy of love, but I understood that I had to shift my perception around it, in order to manifest the love I deserved. 

At that point, I knew that I had to be extremely honest with myself and I’ve noticed that I follow a very specific pattern around my relationships that I had to change if I wanted to be happy! I started examining not only the way I see myself, but also the way I relate to men. This quest for happiness was the reason I became extremely passionate about love relationships. 

Focusing on healing myself and working with my clients over the last 10 years I found that we tend to attract and fall for the “wrong” partner when one or more of these situations apply in our lives: 

  1. When we meet someone at a stage of our lives that we are not confident enough or when we feel lost about a situation ex. low income, unemployment, divorce, depression. 
  2. We want to live a lie. Haha! Yes, it sounds harsh, but in many cases a lot of us want to believe in love wearing pink glasses and having false expectations or ignoring the red flags. Learning to see a person for who he really is, is the key here. 
  3. When we are not very clear about what we want out of a relationship. Many of us want a relationship without examining our core values, wants and needs. Being clear about these, sets the tone of who we really want by our side. 
  4. Settling for much less than we deserve, due to limited beliefs about what is “realistic” and possible in love relationships. Don’t let others’ beliefs affect what you can attract in your love life. Perfect soulmating exists!
  5. Telling negative stories about men. I’m pretty sure most of us have said at least once: “All men are idiots!” after another disappointment. What we believe we attract. Honoring and loving men brings high value men in our lives. 

You deserve the deepest of loves, but you first have to be a vibrational equal to the person you want to attract! 

So who do you choose to become? 

Have you noticed repeated hurtful patterns in your love life? 

Which parts of you need attending and healing?

I will leave you to meditate on one of my favorite oracle quotes: 

“Falling in love is kissing the divine in another, in yourself”Oracle of Mermaids by Lucy Cavendish1sofia2

Love and Light,


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Intuitive Advisor/Love and Relationships Expert

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