By Edwina: The make-up of break-ups pushed into perspective.
It is believed, Queen Elizabeth I of England had a fear of falling in love. Though she loved and allowed several suitors to court her, things never came off. She was a clever and cunning monarch, who proved that women can be just as powerful as men, she never married and later on became known as the Virgin Queen. Could it be circumstance or conditioning, prevailed over her heinous, or does the fear of commitment for all of us lie rooted else where?
Often, those of us who are unfortunate enough to have been subjected to neglect and/or a traumatic childhood experience will likely be impacted by it in later life. Our basic need to survive is a protective response wired to our very core existence, and if it is ever threatened, we give a fight or flight response. This could mean someone we love may be secretly not allowing themselves to develop loving feelings for us, because their sense of protection is more heightened (due to past events) and because of this, they’re insuring their own risk of heartache and pain is limited.
It’s a tricky subject and certainly confronting a lover on their past is perhaps not the best approach. When in the search for love, there are signs in behavior we can look out for…
• Difficulty with intimacy.
• Insecurity over the future.
• Unpredictably aggressive responses/emotions.
• Acting aloof
Many people who have a fear of love may be unaware of their condition. Ignorance is bliss and avoidance of an intense fear cannot be written off. The word “Philos” is Greek for loving, and “Phobos” (phobia) is the Greek for fear. Philophobia is therefore the term used and recognized by professionals to describe this form of mental ill-health. Psychotherapy (talk therapy) can help to overcome this phobic disorder, and receiving advice from a professional is always highly advisable.
Remember, someone with this disorder may suffer from a variety of physical symptoms, when experiencing sensations of love, such as – dizziness, dry mouth, extreme feeling of dread or terror, nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea, profuse sweating, rapid breathing and heart rate, shaking or trembling, shortness of breath.
The human capacity to forge meaningful, intimate, relationships is a gift we should all experience.
If you feel your feelings are not being reciprocated by a lover then perhaps it is time to re-evaluate why that is. Yourself or your lover may well not have Philophobia but that does not mean there isn’t another solution to your circumstances.
Get in contact with me today, I am a Psychic Reader who works with auric energy by channeling divine spirit to guide us both on the path of light and good fortune. I am also a Reiki Master healer and offer all my clients meditations, where healing energy is sent to rejuvenate and restore the heart and soul of our being.
Thank you for reading.
Love and Light,