By Counselor Karen: We all have experienced at one time or another emotional roller coaster at being at the other end of someone’s jealousy. Jealousy is the “green-eyed monster” and it really does affect how we feel about others but mostly about ourselves. Jealousy does not have to consume you on either end. It is about how you react when put in the position of someone else’s scorn.
Most importantly, remembering that “hurting people hurt others” and if you are the happy go lucky person they are targeting, it is because you are doing something right. Jealousy comes from the core of wanting to be like someone else when they are in a good season of their life. The thing is that we all go through seasons. We don’t know what the other person has been through, but they are choosing to be happy in this season and unfortunately that affects those that are not in a good season.
How do you avoid being in the line of fire of a jealous person? Sometimes that is beyond your control, especially if that person is your boss, or someone you have to be around on a daily basis, but how you react can make a huge difference in your own happiness while you have to be around them. Continue to be your happy go lucky self. Life is too short to waste away a season that is being good to you. Continue to be nice to even the one that is showing a rude attitude toward you. There is such a thing as heaping hot coals of kindness on someone else and it is benefiting in the end.
Jealous people do not have the capacity to admit or see the error of their ways. They are just blinded by their own hate. The more you have it together, the more they will try to make your life miserable. Jealousy does not have to have a reason to exist. It’s human nature to just “not like” those that seem to have it all together when they are falling apart. Try to distance yourself as much as possible from the negative person. Because we all know that negative can be contagious. I always like to say pray for them as well because sometimes they know not what they do.
I think the most important thing to remember is that if someone is truly jealous of you for being a happy person, then you are doing something right. Don’t change who you are to fit in. Eventually they will grow tired of hating on one person and go to another because jealousy consumes like fire and a jealous person always has more than one scapegoat to go to. Jealousy is such a wasted emotion. Instead of hating on the person that is bringing joy around, the jealous person is missing out on the amazing person that someone is.
Just as negative is contagious, so is a happy heart. We all are put here for a reason and even in the line of fire of someone else’s jealousy, there is always good that can come from just being you. Keep spreading the cheer in hopes of always changing the attitude because no matter what there will always be the negative Jelly Nelly.
Love and Light,
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